Blogs - Chief of Pray Blog

Great Minds Discuss Ideas

"Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people."
-Eleanor Roosevelt

I suppose I fit all three categories: I often discuss ideas, events and people. There was mention in my circle, of a prominent spiritual leader and his wife who are having “domestic problems.” Everyone who was there knew exactly what she was talking about and there was brief discussion about the two people involved. It was very discreet and, as I said, very brief. To my credit, I did not ask for details at the time. To my weakness, I rushed home, Googled the two names; and got the whole juicy story.

Rabbi Marc Schneier, who is widely acclaimed for his work in inter-faith relations, and friendship with Russell Simmons, was cheating on his wife with a younger woman. His wife hired a private detective, got proof, and filed for divorce.  Maybe I would have let it go, if not for the revelation from the estranged husband: he announced to his congregation that he has bi-polar disorder. What?!!! Sexual addiction as an excuse, was already taken? In conclusion, my small mind felt the need to discuss these people.

I cop to discussing events. I cannot attend an “anything” without rehashing it with my BFF, my mother, or anyone who cares. After my niece Stef’s wedding, I had to wait nearly a week to discuss it with my sister-in-law Linda, who went on a parent’s honeymoon following the festivities. I was incomplete until she got back and I could share with her all the details she may have missed as MOB.

When it comes to discussing ideas, I must really have a great mind! I can’t shut up about all the ideas I have. Not only my own ideas, but just about everyone else’s too. In fact I’d like to discuss Eleanor Roosevelt’s idea about discussions: "Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people." I’m not so sure she has it right. I don’t think discussion can be so easily labeled.

I’ve had really important discussions about people, that are enlightening and helpful, and don’t necessarily resort to gossip. (Unlike the first paragraph in my blog today.) Discussions on events can be entertaining and educational, and not just babble about worthless happenings. (Huge disclaimer: Dancing With the Stars does NOT constitute an event.) And, I have been trapped into horrible discussions about nonsensical and sometimes malicious ideas that are demeaning and destructive.

Once again, labeling doesn’t work. Even great minds like Eleanor Roosevelt, come up with a stinker every once in a while. People, events and ideas can be quite different below the surface when you take a good deeper look.  It’s time to resist putting everyone and everything into neat little categories— it doesn’t work. Truths are not always what they seem.

Sounding Board

Help us hear all those who are trying to reach us.
Truthful but tactful, diplomatic, but direct.
Provide the strength to look past small slights
and get to the story behind infractions.
Help us hear what isn’t said.
As we go through our own life’s travels,
inspire others to lend an ear 
even when they’re in a hurry or in a bind.
Make it possible for all 
to sense the need in an angry tone,
the fretful love in a stressed mother’s voice,
the silent screams in heavy hearts.

-Ruth Williams