Alberta was turning forty. She woke one morning, a week before her milestone birthday, with an idea – a brainstorm, an “Ah-Hah” moment. It was the perfect plan!
Alberta decided she would not wait any longer to have a child.
(Mostly) every little girl dreams about being a mother someday. Alberta was no exception. She had a large collection of baby dolls and Chrissy was her favorite. She would play for hours with Chrissy, feeding her, dressing her, and loving her squishy little baby doll body and her cherubic plastic baby doll face.
When Alberta was too old to play with dolls she carried her motherly love over to Greta, the little girl who lived next door. She became more than just a baby sitter and playmate to the sweet and sensitive child. The two spent many years together growing from stage to stage, sharing disappointments, and sharing each other’s joy. Alberta had a lot of practice in loving and giving.
Alberta moved from the East coast of the country to the west coast and attended college in California. She enjoyed school and was an excellent student. She was popular with the girls and guys on campus, and Alberta had Gary, her boyfriend from second semester freshman year until the summer after graduation – when it’s not unusual for relationships to fall apart.
1984 was an era of awakening possibilities for women. Alberta was bright and ambitious. She had a good job with a global insurance company where her rock solid work ethic was appreciated. It wasn’t long before she climbed the ranks in her company and became its first female national sales manager. With success comes responsibility. Her job required a lot of travel to far away places. She was constantly on airplanes, in hotels, and at meetings. Alberta had countless interactions with scores of smart men and women who kept her interested and kept her interesting.
Everyone loved Alberta, but no one in particular was in love with her.
That brings us to the morning a week before her 40th when the single woman chose to become a single mom. Lest you be judgemental, know this. Alberta’s plan was well thought out, discussed and supported by her family. She prayed on her decision and felt God’s acceptance for what she was about to undertake.
A baby boy was born.
Todd was perfect. Alberta adored him, provided for him, and did what any good mother does – she raised him in love.
It’s not easy being a mother under any circumstances, and being a single mother has its own unique challenges. But it’s a lot easier to raise a child on your own when you have the financial means, a supportive extended family, and faith. Alberta and Todd had all three.
Then they were a plus-one.
Tony came into Alberta’s life when Todd was twelve. They married. Tony was the missing male influence for Todd and as a stepfather he was stellar. That’s why Alberta was surprised, no – shocked, when Todd came to her at the age of 16 for “the talk”.
He was angry.
Todd said, “How could you do what you did to me? How dare you deprive me of a real father when you know how important fathers are. How would you feel if you didn’t have Grandpa when you were a kid?”
Talk about a sucker punch to the gut. Alberta was stunned. Hurt. Defeated.
This wasn’t something she could talk to Tony about. She couldn’t tell her own Dad about the fatherless hole Todd felt when grandpa thought he had filled it so completely. She could only hope that it’s merely emotional teenager talk, and Todd would soon grow out of it.
Yet her son’s feelings could not be ignored. It was mid-June and the air was heavy with preparations for Father’s Day. Everywhere you turned there were ads, store displays, and social media posts all touting the message of Father’s Day: “Remember your Dad on Sunday.”
Alberta and Tony were getting ready for church on Sunday when Todd announced he wasn’t going with them. Theirs was a mega church with separate teen services which Todd normally loved. He hung out with his church friends, enjoyed the band, and never complained about going…until now. His mother had a decision to make: Force her six-foot tall son to go, or let him stay home and stew.
She chose neither.
Alberta sent Tony on his way and she stayed back with Todd. “Let’s take a walk.” she suggested.
It was a glorious day. Warm winds surrounded them, sunshine streamed down on them, green grass beneath their feet, and blue skies overhead. It was a Sunday to thank God by being out among His creation.
Mother and son walked in silence. They walked a couple of miles and Alberta took Todd’s hand in hers. He let her. She squeezed it. He squeezed it back.
That’s the thing about being the only child and having only a mom for so many years. There’s a stronger, special bond between mother and son when you have each other all to yourself. They both felt it.
Alberta was the one who broke the silence with her own version of a prayer from Psalms 68. “Dear God, you are Father to the fatherless, defender of mothers going it on their own, your world is holy and we are grateful.”
Todd turned to his mother and simply said, “Amen”.