I’m raging with ire, an ocean of fire, My Wrath is the path to all I desire. Oh Lord, forgive me my Zins. I’m inflated with pride, near-bursting inside, A self-centered repenter, Vanitys’ bride. Oh Lord, forgive me my Zins. I’m mired in mud, … [Read more...]
Humor: Jackass
Father Brendan O'Malley got up one fine spring day and walked to the window of his bedroom to get a deep breath of the beautiful day outside, and noticed there was a jackass lying dead in the middle of his front lawn. He promptly called the local … [Read more...]
Humor: Satan’s Place
Three men died and went to the after-world. They were all bad seeds, no-good nicks. None of the three men had added value to the world. In fact, they were destroyers of the world. The men were directed down to Satan‘s area. Satan says to the men, … [Read more...]
Humor: Inviting a Centipede to Church
A single guy decides life would be more fun if he had a pet. So he went to the pet store and told the owner that he wanted to buy an unusual pet. After some discussion, he finally bought a centipede (a 100-legged bug) that came in a little white … [Read more...]
Humor: Snail and Me
One day I was walking home. I noticed a snail on the sidewalk along my path and kicked it to the side. A year later, I heard a knock at the door. I opened the door, looked out, and then looked down. It was the snail who said: “What … [Read more...]
Humor: Biker Dude
One day a biker dude was riding his motorcycle along the Pacific Coast Highway in California and heard God’s voice. God said: “You’ve always been such a good person…I would like to repay your kindness. What can I do for you?" The biker … [Read more...]
Humor: Getting Into Heaven
"If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale, and gave all my money to the church, would that get me into Heaven?" the teacher asked the children in her Sunday School class. "NO!" the children all answered. "If I cleaned the church … [Read more...]
Humor: The End is Near
A priest and pastor from the local parishes are standing by the side of the road holding up a sign that reads, "The End is Near! Turn yourself around now before it's too late!" "Leave us alone, you religious nuts!" yelled the driver as he sped … [Read more...]
Humor: Heavenly Dining
Mother Teresa died and went to heaven. God greeted her at the Pearly Gates. "Be thou hungry, Mother Teresa?" asked God. "I could eat," Mother Teresa replied. So God opened a can of tuna and reached for a chunk of rye bread, and they began to … [Read more...]
Humor: Idiot!
The pastor gets up one Sunday morning to find a letter on her porch. She opens it, and in large letters, it says: IDIOT. The pastor folds it, puts it in her purse, and proceeds to the church. When it’s time for her sermon, she shows the … [Read more...]
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